February 29, 2012

  • A decision to reframe things

    Frequently when I have something to do after work, something that might detract from our typical schedule I’ll tell Coupon the night before.  “Ok, tomorrow after work I’m doing this and this and that, so I won’t be home and you’re on your own for dinner . . .”  etc.

    What inevitably happens is that Coupon wasn’t listening.  He’ll call me the next day and say the usual “So what’s the plan for tonight?”

    My first response was to sigh and say to myself “I seriously just told him the plan last night!”  And then I decided that was negative thinking that wasn’t productive.  I decided instead that I could reframe it as, he likes to talk to me most days.  He likes to call me and hear my voice.

    It carries me through — at least until next time.

February 27, 2012

  • Holy Weekend!

    Wow, I’ve been meaning to post, but honestly I didn’t have anything worth posting about until this weekend.

    First, a heartbreak of a kind.  My Little Sister, is 12.  She lives with her dad who single parents.  I think he’s sort of hands-off, but not intentionally – more of a “I’m not quite sure what I’m doing” kind of way.  Anyway, she and I make plans to get together yesterday just yesterday.  Then her dad calls. 

    Her dad tells me that she got caught stealing this past week at the local Wal-Mart.  She was with a friend who’s gotten caught before and he thinks she probably gave into peer pressure.  She’s also failing math and though she’s still doing ok in other classes not as good as she used to.

    My heart fell a bit.  I am honored, though, that her dad wanted me to know.  He wanted me to be aware, not to discipline her, not to chide her, but to know in case if came up and so I could get her to talk to me or whatever.  When we got together for a walk on the trail that goes around the airport I tried to hint at things, but she either didn’t take the bait or was trying to not tell me. 

    I asked how parent-teacher conferences had gone and she told me she didn’t know that her dad had gone.  “Well, did he tell you how your teachers said you were doing?”  “Nope!”  Hmmmmm, it feels fishy and I don’t like that.  I wish she felt she could be honest with me.

    Then, I asked how other things were and she said “fine” a few times.  *Sigh*  I know that just because I’m her Little Sister doesn’t mean she won’t do anything bad ever.  And I know that I am not in her life to discipline here.  I want to keep our relationship fresh and current so she hopefully feels like she can talk to me.  That’s all I can really ask for.
    —-
    That being said . . . I’ve signed up as Team Captain for a Bowl for Kids’ Sake team.  Our team name is The Freudian Slips and if you’d like to donate (anything works!) let me know via private message and I’ll send you the link to our page!  And thanks to @ShamrockLover who has already donated! 
    —-
    And then there was today.  Holy weirdness.  I saw my ex, the felon from the previous city I lived in.  Last I heard from him he was in Minnesota reportedly finishing up his Bachelor’s Degree. 

    Today I’m in the grocery store self-check-out lane and it’s the kind where there are two on each side with a wide “aisle” between them.  So, I’m waiting for one of the four slots to open up and there is a guy who looks an awful lot like my ex.  I watch his mannerisms and he acts like him too.  His hair looks like him, his feel and shoes look like him.  Finally a slot opens up and he’s STILL checking out by the time I’m done, so I get a few more good looks in and decide it’s him.  I said his name and he turned around and he’s the same weird guy he was then.

    Apparently he got a job with the state.  Now, we’re the capital, but there are certainly state jobs elsewhere, so I thought maybe he was travelling for work.  Nope, he lives here now.  He stays he works for the Department of Labor in data processing after he got his BA degree.  Well, good for him.  Though my heart was racing a good while after and I just really couldn’t believe it.

    The ONLY and I mean, ONLY thing better about this ex than my current boyfriend was he was more giving with affection and he got me off better.  Now, he had TONS of cons.  He was convicted of a felony at 18, had at least two legal issues going on in the 6 months we dated, and was just not . . . super honest about everything I don’t think.  He’s nice enough, but had weird syntax in his speech and weird mannerisms.  He’s just strange.  I don’t miss him at all, but because I have a hard time letting totally go of people I’ve dated I’ve always been curious about how he’s doing.  Has he cleaned his life up or gotten into more trouble.  He was my “bad boy” and I didn’t knowingly date a bad boy.  He was the most drama-filled guy I’d ever dated.  It’s weird to think he lives here now and I could potentially run into him again.  I sort of WANT to run into him with Coupon on my arm.  Is that snarky of me?
    —-
    Oh, and I finally got some Girl Scout cookies today.  No one asked me to order any.  Sad!
    —-
    Oh, and @PennyLumpkins, you’ll like this!  I finished Freakonomics at the gym today and started my next book More Letters from Penthouse (yes, the magazine).  It’s basically people’s letters of their sexual exploits they wrote to the magazine.  It ends up reading like erotic and got me so hot I had to come home and get myself off.  Hadn’t done THAT in awhile!

January 23, 2012

  • I suck at this blogging thing . . .

    I never feel like I have any time to write, and then when I sit down, I feel like I have nothing valuable to contribute.

    But then I realize you all have no clue what my days are like unless I tell you.  So here’s what I’ll tell you:

    - Coupon and I are working out 6-7 days a week.  There’s a Biggest Loser competition I’m participating in and the winner will take everyone’s $50 . . . for a total of $1650.  It would be awesome to win!

    - Volleyball starts up in less than a month and I’m soooo excited.  We have a few people from last year returning, but most of our team will be people who didn’t play last year or are totally new to my agency. 

    - That brings me to another thing — work is going pretty well.  We had a tree-day training last week and that was obnoxious, but not too shabby.  Though it means other work had to be put off it is always nice to have time out of the office.  I get another day out of the office this week.  We have a new guy starting tomorrow and another guy starting before the month is up.  Then we’ll be fully staffed.  First time in a LONG TIME!  The nature of our work has a lot of turnover, but we had some unexpected glitches in the last year that had people leaving us before we (or they) expected.  *Sigh*  The good thing is our new people seem to have really good experience, a good interest in staying here, and some even have experience living in AK before, so they’re not afraid of a little wind and rain!

    - I’m being good about reading too and am reading on the recumbent bike (and sometimes treadmill).  It makes it slightly less boring for me and keeps me up on my reading.  I don’t always get to read though — when Coupon makes me to intervals there isn’t much time for reading . . .

    - I’m not seeing a change in the scale yet, but I am in some clothing fitting . . . it’s a good sign and I hope I see more of it soon.

    - My Little Sister and I have been baking, saw the new Alvin & the Chipmunks movie and this Friday saw Lunafest.  Great films again this year.  If Lunafest is in your area I urge you to check it out.  So empowering to see great films that were made for, by and about women.  Some were a bit mature, but she’s a pretty mature gal, so at intermission I picked her brain about the obstetric fistula one and the transgendered kid one.  At the end we talked again about if there were things she had questions about and the bad words some used.  She’s so smart.  She told me that she liked all the movies because they taught her about other people’s lives and “human nature.”  I was awfully proud of her global 12-year-old view.  It was also a great way to give her permission to talk to me about girl stuff.  She lives with her father only and hasn’t seen her mom in quite awhile.  She has a grandmother in town, but I’m not sure how much they chat about girl stuff.  At any rate, I want her to make sure she has someone to talk to when she needs to about anything and everything.  Oh, I even won a door prize!  It was a print of a water color with lots of purples and swans (not my style) and done by an Alaskan artist, so I gave it to my LS and she was thrilled!

    - We’re still hoping to get LASIK or ICL.  We’ve gotten a few quotes and ICL is about double the cost of LASIK, so of course that’s what they push.  Maybe that’s the route we should go.  It is reversible and I can understand why they would say we’re not great candidates for LASIK, but at the same time, it’s just a LOT of money to fork out for your eyes.  We’ll see.  We’re hoping to use our free Alaska Airlines flights for that.

    That’s about all I think of for now . . . really trying to do better!

December 24, 2011

  • Happy New Year

    2011 has been a good year. 

    It’s been my first full year of living with Nick.

    It’s my first full year in this city.

    It was a great year for traveling!

    We moved into a wonderful house this year.

    We met new people through our tenants and co-workers.

    We did some home improvement together and didn’t kill each other — yet.

    I gained a niece.

    I made more money that I expected to because I’ve had some good on-call months.

    I caught up with my reading.

    I didn’t do so hot with my Xanga posting, but I hope to get back more regularly in 2012.

    I continued to donate $25 almost every paycheck to Kiva.org and now I’m getting repayments of over $120 each repayment day.  It’s stinkin’ addictive and I love that I’m helping people.

    We have a freezer full of halibut, salmon, crab, deer and moose meat to be thankful for.

    I wish you all a very Merry Christmas, a wonderful New Year and I’ll see ya back here soonish!

    xoxo

November 26, 2011

  • It’s been a busy, snowy November so far . . .

    This is our deck with half-barrel planters.

    So, I’m openly pro-choice and I’m reading this book of stories from men and women about illegal abortions done before abortion was legalized.

    There are some particularly poignant quotes from the foreword I just feel the need to keep or save — not necessarily share with you all.  They’re really more for myself, but if you get something from it – good!  Italics are mine.

    It is important to remember, whether you approve or disapprove of abortion, that other people will live their lives the best they can.  Married women will make their decisions with regards to the needs of the children they already have, their husbands’ desire and character, their families’ economic status, and the other burdens on their time and energy.  The legality or illegality of abortion is more of a determinant whether such a woman survives her choice than whether she makes it.

    “Sex leads to pregnancy less certainly than sugar leads to tooth decay, but we do not think of punishing teenagers for eating fast food by withholding dental work.  We will not prevent women from terminating undesired pregnancies by making abortion, illegal, dangerous and not infrequently fatal.  We will simply increase the amount of misery and danger in our society.” 

    ::feeling particularly social work-y today::

October 30, 2011

  • Home from Mexico!

    I’m home from Mexico!

    It was super hot, but beautiful!

    I caught my first dorado (Mahi Mahi) and the other boys caught other fishies!
     
     

    We went on a “sunset cruise.”  Not quite a booze cruise thankfully, but not quite as serene as we wanted.
     

    Had some good food, including a nice anniversary dinner with Coupon!

    I love some bad English and things that we don’t have in the US.
     

October 8, 2011

  • scurrying about

    I still read Xanga all the time, but I constantly feel like I’m thinking “I should write an entry” and then I’m constantly apologizing.

    Moving past that . . .

    I’m here, well, and trucking along. 

    Work continues to be stressful.  I know we’re just in transition and there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but until then it is just lots of drama and overwhelming feelings.  But, the good news is that *I* still enjoy what *I* do for work there — it’s the other stuff going on around me that can be crazy-making.

    We are nearly renter-free.  D is technically still renting from us, however, he’s been gone for nearly two weeks and he won’t return until we’re nearly home from Mexico and then he’s off to his houseboat!  It has been so nice to feel as though we have the house to ourselves and the boy may have even responded to that — he gave me an impromptu backrub tonight.  That is sooo unlike him — but I liked it and gave him kudos for that. (He just asked if I was writing about about him and when I told him yes, he asked if I said how awesome he was.  The answer was, of course, yes!)

    My Little Sister and I have had some good fun lately.  We got to go ziplining a few weekends ago and today we participated in a run/walk/roll for mental health awareness week and national disability month.  We had fun and then headed to the (pitiful) first annual Great Pumpkin Festival.

    No one told me my hat was crooked

    There she goes!

    I’ve been feeling sort of fall-ish lately and have made some things with pumpkin.  I bought pumpkin specifically for the pumpkin cranberry cookies I have made and enjoyed before.  When I had pumpkin left over I made pumpkin orange muffins (and added chocolate chips for good measure).  Both were a hit and got me hoping for more spice and pumpkin in my life! 

    The weather really hasn’t gotten too icky lately, but it’ll still be nice to get out of town and into different scenery for the weekend.  After we get back from the SF Bay area we have just a few days before we head back out — to Mexico for a week!  WOOHOO!

    Today has been pretty productive.  In addition to hanging with my Little Sister, I got the recycling taken to the center, picked up a few basic groceries, made a deposit at the bank, picked up some certified mail at the Post Office and ran a few errands with the boy.  Back at home I’ve done laundry, painted my toe nails, cooked a Gourmet White Pizza (we used halibut, deer-burger, Canadian bacon and pepperoni on it), and gotten some pen-pal stuff done.  And still managed to relax. 

    Tomorrow I have no set plans other than to be on-call.  I hope that I can get some more productivity under my belt and I want to get packing done specifically.

September 16, 2011

  • Bits & Pieces

    So, there is just really too much to catch up so it’s back to bullets!

    - My parents’ visit was good!  It was definitely trying at times, but as I age (and they age) I am increasingly glad when we get to spend good time together.

    - We went on a Tracy Arm Fjord Tour.  The same company where that YouTube video shows a HUGE calving lead to pieces of glacier FLYING at the people on the boat super fast.  That did NOT happen for us.

    - Coupon has been in Fairbanks since Friday on his moose hunt.  He’s not checked in with me at all, but thankfully I’ve been able to check in with his brother’s girlfriend.  She doesn’t know MUCH more than me, but she was able to tell me they’ve been home once and dropped off a severed moose head.  They wouldn’t bring back a head of a cow, so that means they got bull and still have their two cow permits to use.  But, they’re STILL out, which means they’re having a hard time spotting/killing a moose!

    - While he’s been gone I’ve been pretty productive!  I’ve been hitting the gym or some sort of exercise each night this week and finding time to read while I’m at it.  I finished one book and started another last night.

    - Work has been pretty nuts.  We’ve had people get fired, pushed out, or choosing to leave in the last month and a half or so.  It’s so frustrating because we’re still down a lot of people and yet work goes on as usual.  I still am doing just as many intakes as before and I have HALF the number of usual clinicians to assign clients too.  It makes the clinicians we do have way overfull and that’s just not good therapy.  However, I still love my job and I still think it is a good place to work.  I have no plans on leaving!

    - The newest gal at work feels the same and we have really connected on a few levels.  We have had some similar Alaskan work experiences and she’s just a rad lady.  It’s always nice to have a new friend in town.

    - We have been absolutely LUCKY to have like 3-4 SUNNY days in the last week.  Coupon left on Friday and Saturday and Sunday were both gorgeous.  Today was sunny, but not as warm as last weekend.  When you live here, you never know how many more days like that you’ll get so you relish them!  Oh, and by warm, I mean about 60F. ;)   Puts that in perspective huh?  I love living here because 65F is about as hot as I need to be.

    - It sounds like we’ve got a buyer for the condo which is nice.  It’ll be great to not have to worry about that.  Tomorrow or Satruday I’m going to get over there and pick up some of the books and kitchen items I left here.  We rented it furnished and the buyer wants to rent it out as well, so we negotiated to sell the furniture with the place, but of course, my personal books do not count! :D

    - That also means our renters will be leaving soon.  Well, at least one will.  The other (the one we like more anyway!)

    - I’m getting really excited about our trips in October.  We’re going to the SF Bay area for one weekend and then the next weekend we leave for Mexico and will be to the following weekend.  I’m unfortunately not nearly as toned as I’d like to be for my swimsuit-wearing, but I’m just excited to go and get away!

    - I have a Heartsy addiction that I really need to reign in.  *Sigh*  You should have this addiction too!  It would make me feel better about myself and if you were to say I referred you I’d get MOOLAH!  (Heartsy, btw, is like Groupon or LivingSocial or Eversave, but ONLY for Etsy shops!!!!!!!)

August 30, 2011

  • Super mini bulleted update!

    - My parents are here.  They got here yesterday and had a successful first full day going “out the road.”

    - My parents shipped my dresser that I stripped and refinished here.  It made it in one piece and was still cheaper than buying a newer, poorly made one!

    - It’s my birthday on Wednesday!

    More to come . . . I know I’ve been horrible about posting.